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Emotional freedom means breaking free from the paralyzing effect that negative emotions can have on our lives. Breaking free empowers us to make positive choices in spite of our emotions. While we may not be able to rid ourselves totally of these negative emotions, we can certainly learn to control them. Learning to understand our emotions can also allow us to feel better despite our feelings and circumstances.

If we can learn to manage emotions such as fear, anger, guilt, shame, and anxiety, we will be well on the way to enjoying emotional freedom. The biggest challenge that I have faced in my quest for emotional freedom is coming to terms with having depression. To enjoy freedom in my life, even with depression, I had to learn how to manage my depression. The first step to becoming free is to identify each emotion.
There are often times that we feel very unhappy, but really don’t know why. It takes some time and thought to discover the cause of our unhappiness. Feeling frustrated, misunderstood, or unappreciated are a few possible causes of a feeling of general discontent. Sometimes too, our emotions can be deeper and harder to understand. This can create what is known as emotional beggage -lingering fears, phobias, and issues we have from unresolved past experiences.

Once you have been able to get specific about your feelings, the next step is figuring out what has triggered them. Perhaps you feel frustrated as a result of knowing what you want to achieve, but not knowing how to go about getting there. Just understanding that you are frustrated, and why, can ease the frustration somewhat. By acknowledging your feelings, you have a much better chance of accepting the fact that your frustration might continue for a while. Since you don’t have a clear idea yet of how to achieve your goal, it’s best to accept that your progress might be very slow at this stage.

Frustration is always a result of a conflict between what you want and your current reality.
It’s amazing how acceptance of your circumstances and realizing that they may take time to change can actually reduce the frustration. Understanding and acceptance empowers us. This is the essence of emotional freedom- lessening the power of our emotions over us by recognizing and accepting them.

At this point you might decide to shift your focus onto areas of your life that are going the way you want them to. Putting the cause of your frustration aside for a while can sometimes free your subconscious mind to come up with fresh ideas.

Becoming aware of your frustration can also help you to get creative about ways to eliminate it. Perhaps you can brainstorm some different ideas to get you started towards your goal. Otherwise you might find an easier short-term alternative that can provide the fulfillment that you are seeking. This is the part of gaining emotional freedom that encompasses self development.

For example, if the goal you want to achieve is finding a satisfying career, you can start gaining satisfaction right where you are. If the career you dream of involves writing, try thinking of a way to include more writing in your current job. If your current job really doesn’t provide any opportunities for creative expression, do it as a hobby. Doing what you love empowers you and paves the way for future possibilities. It’s amazing how many successful people have started their careers by following their passions just for fun.
Whichever way you end up proceeding with your dreams, the important thing is to proceed with an open heart and mind. Understanding and validating your emotions - the good, the bad, and the ugly- is the key to emotional freedom.



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There's a lot going on in my mind and I don't like to share it all with everybody. Also, it's like I have a lot more mind filters than anybody else. Like there are some people who are really talkative and just seem to say whatever random thought that pops into their mind (not that there's anything wrong with that--sometimes I envy people who can say anything and just not care), and others who take a little bit more time to think about what they'll say before they say it. And then there are people like myself, who have several mind filters and sift through thoughts until they're certain that they really want to say that thing.
I think when everyone else is talking, I'm observing. You learn a lot from observing people. I like quiet people--they're usually the ones with the most substance or, you know...they're slow.

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Our lives should be a continual journey that gets better and better as we advance in time. Why is it that we sometimes allow ourselves to get stuck in places and situations that are unfulfilling, and do not bring us true joy? Whether a job or a relationship? Is it that we just become lazy and complacent? Are we paralyzed by fear? Or is it because we have succumbed to the notion that true happiness is a myth?

Complacency
Oftentimes we find ourselves doing the same thing, the same way, day after day. Yet, the life that we are living has become lackluster and routine. Begin to view life as a journey, and not merely a destination. Don’t arrive at a certain place and just decide to stay there. Continue to travel through life, experiencing one new adventure after another. How will you discover life’s treasures if you are not willing to explore its many facets? If you stop at your first destination, and decide that this is where you want to live forever – you may truly do yourself an injustice, because life has so much more to offer.

Complacency sneaks up on us. We accept a particular lifestyle because we view it as comfortable. But the bigger question is, “Is it ideal?” Why do we allow ourselves to get trapped in this place of hypothetical contentment, and all the while complain that we are unfulfilled? We talk about the things that we desire to accomplish, but fail to take action. We become lazy, and rather than get out and explore other opportunities, we just accept where we are and do not take the necessary steps to produce change. We make excuses and put things off until “tomorrow”. And then tomorrow turns into tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow – then NEVER.

Fear
During our lifetime we will undoubtedly experience some type of fear. But such fears as FEAR of failure, FEAR of rejection, FEAR of change, FEAR of the unknown (to name a few), can be detrimental to our growth and well being. Fear is often a silent inhibitor, because too often we are not able to identify this as the source of our stagnation. On the surface, it may very well appear to be one thing – but at the root is where we uncover the truth… fear. One can never effectively resolve any issue if you fail to identify the true source.

Happiness… A Myth?
Realistically, we know that the perfect life does not exist. Perfect by definition refers to something that is free of problems, errors, or shall we say, "roadblocks”. What we fail to realize is that roadblocks are a necessary intrusion in our lives. They are designed to get our attention – to redirect and get us back on course.

Attempting to achieve something that is not realistically attainable is setting yourself up for failure. So let’s not focus on the perfect life, let’s instead aspire to live a fulfilling life; one where joy outweighs pain. True happiness does exist, but we have to be willing to make the investment of self discovery so that we unquestionably know what it takes to truly make us happy. Ingredients for a happy life are not scripted, therefore you cannot go by what society dictates as necessary elements for true happiness. Only you can determine what is necessary and best for you. We create all these fantasies in our minds of the various things that we desire, and most often do not take it any further. Put it on paper. Write your personal story of how you desire to live your life. However, you cannot be satisfied with this accomplishment alone, because at this point your story is simply a book of fiction. Once you write your story, you must then live it out. Only then will you see the transformation from fiction to non-fiction.

In conclusion, I have determined that, for me, a Sabbatical is very necessary. A Sabbatical is defined as a period away from your normal routine - a time to immerse yourself in a different environment, a chance to see your life from a different perspective. Yes, this is absolutely what I need – and have a feeling that I just might be in good company. From time to time, especially when we are going through transition, we definitely need to take time out to purge the clutter from our mind, reassess, and get things back into perspective.

Wishing you a Happily Ever After.

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