ASK

In a marriage, what are the limits for friendship with a member of the opposite sex? Who sets these limits? What is the difference between a friendship and an emotional affair? Is an emotional affair wrong? Does an emotional affair help the marriage by letting a partner vent out all emotional frustration, which otherwise he/she would not have done with his/her spouse? Or does it kill the marriage?

Most of us have friendships. Many of us are very close in some of our friendships. We share quite a lot in such friendships. But when one develops such a close friendship with a member of the opposite sex, it can be termed as an emotional affair. Sharing intimate emotional

details with someone of opposite sex is called an emotional affair. This the the common definition. It also includes the clause that you are keeping your partner unaware about the emotional bond you share with someone else.

It hurts a marriage if after knowing about the details shared, the spouse feels that mutual trust was violated. If the emotional affair becomes strong, it may so happen that one may begin sharing more emotional details with one’s friend than with one’s spouse. That hurts the spouse and may also lead to a break-up.

It has being debated whether an emotional affair is purely emotional or it has begun because of physical attraction. Does one need a friend of opposite sex to share emotional details? Why not one of your own sex? And why does one feel uncomfortable with one’s spouse about this bond? If one wants to have emotional sharing, or to vent out feelings, one can easily consult a psychiatrist which will help her feel relieved and get advice. Or one can chose a friend of the same sex.

One who is involved in an emotional affair needs to ask own self if this is only emotional? Why do I need this person to talk about everything? You must reflect. Talk it out with your spouse. Let your head control your heart for a moment and think about the marriage and the bond. This may help you to understand an emotional affair and help you to come out of it.