ASK
Is this normal or is it a problem?
"A few months ago, I began a friendship with a male. We became best friends. Most of the time we talked a few hours like we were having a special relationship but always deep in my heart I would tell myself that we were just close friends, nothing more. Lately he started to change. He did not contact me and he was not as caring as before. I know I can't do anything about it and that's why I am trying my very best to accept the fact that he cannot be my closest friend anymore, the friend that I can be with almost all the time. I did many things that I love to do to keep me busy but he’s still there hanging onto my thoughts!. I hope you can help me.”
DEAR ..It is very upsetting to see someone who was your best friend, cut you off and act detached, like nothing ever happened. Your thoughts keep gravitating back to the past when you felt so close, shared so many experiences and really felt understood and comfortable with each other. It hurts to have that disappear. The pain and frustration you feel is justified and it's going to take time to heal the void that you are experiencing. You had a wonderful relationship with this person and you were not prepared to lose him so soon. Many people feel exactly the way you do when they have had a close relationship with their sister, brother or adult child. All of a sudden, their best friend is gone or now sharing their thoughts and time with someone else.
He will always have a special place in your heart and no one can take away the wonderful memories you've shared. In the future when you fall deeply in love and connect with a man on an emotional level, you'll finally be able to see that this relationship served a purpose for a limited amount of time and it was never meant to be anything but a friendship. As you continue to mature and look back on your life you'll see that many people come and go and are in our lives for a short time. It's normal and not a problem........others are meant to be around for a long time or even a lifetime.
Unfortunately, time is the only thing that will heal the frustration, hurt and pain you feel - NOTHING ELSE. It takes time to get over a relationship with someone you cared about. Everyone has a different time clock. Give yourself permission to grieve your loss and in time it will get less and less painful. If you do bump into them, I know that your heart will pound and your face may be flushed but you can and should say, "Hi" and smile. Act as if you already are what you will be in the future - happy, independent and approachable. This way you always leave the door open.
Makkah Time
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