ASK
I don’t have any answers to explain how some people can inflict unspeakably horrific actions upon other people.
When we talk about forgiveness, it’s easy for the person to become angry for such an outrageous suggestion. Why forgive when the inclination is to seek revenge? Forgiveness is an internal affair. Forgiveness is a choice made that has little or nothing to do with another person. We forgive entirely and totally for our own sake, not for others. There’s no easy answer and no simple formula for forgiveness. Forgiveness does not happen on its’ own and time does not heal all wounds but when you decide you are ready to let go, then answers of how to forgive will come. Even then, it’s a process. You engage in the choice to forgive over and over and over again. Until finally one day, maybe in the near future or maybe not until many years from now, you realize something is different within you. No longer do you live consumed with anger, you now live in a world where love, peace, safety, and joy are available to you.
ASK
I NEVER treat someone like the "enemy" until he/she gives me reason to treat them... otherwise...I rather like to think people are basically good...I treat men like I want to be treated myself...however, if they show me that they cannot act like human beings, what should I do to them?
Dear friend..
"Don't do anything. Next time he/she comes up to you and starts hurling insults DON'T SAY A WORD. Just look at him/her like he/she is the most disgusting thing you have ever seen, with a little smirk on your face eventually he/she will get bored and walk away. It will drive him/her crazy. He/she is not worth your time and energy. If he/she goes to hit you by all means hit him/her back. But from this moment don't say another word to him/her. He/she is doing this to get a reaction from you, if you don’t react to what he/she is saying he/she will be so shocked. NOT forgiving someone is okay! Depending on who it is/what they did/what happened…some things are just plain unforgivable and that is okay!"
ASK
Has it came to your mind who your friend is? I mean a real friend whom you can rely on? One who keeps contact to you whatever happens? One who does not wait to have the reasons behind to contact you? For good and for bad times?
Do you still have contact to each other? It does not matter which part of the world where she/he lives. I am sure that it is not a problem nowadays. The world is getting smaller everyday through internet.
For me, a real friend is somebody whom I can talk to and to whom I can communicate freely. The one who can accept me whatever and whoever I am with all my positive and negative nature. One who cares and respects me, be there for me not only at happy moments but also at bad times. One who does not wait for me to contact her/him, from time to time has the initiative to contact me with her/his own free will, just to have a "nonsense" chat with me. One who not only listens to what I say about myself and my family but also tells me what is going on in her/his life because friendship is all about giving, taking and sharing each others life.
I hope that my "lost" friend can read this. It seems that you are getting very far away from me.
ASK
Losing respect for someone is not reversible; when
its lost its lost, it's gone. It's not a misunderstanding, it's a choice, a
person's decision to do something disrespecting towards themselves so it's not
like conflict between parties where apologizing or forgiving someone or vice
versa, where strong character and respect is shown between two parties for
whatever reason, where both parties gain and move forward together or move on
separately but with respect and still somewhat caring feelings about each
other. When respect is lost because of weak character resulting in
disrespectful displays and selfish showings only one party gains and that's the
party that shows they don't care what anyone thinks except for themselves so in
turn they got everything that they set out for and in return also get what they
show, no care, no respect by showing....no care, no respect
ASK
You cannot control what others say about you but you
certainly can control what you say about others. Let your words be seasoned
with grace and do not allow corrupt communications to come out of your mouth. A
major part of self-control is tongue-control.
Makkah Time
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